Editor | On 16, Apr 2005

By Gennady Kizevich@list.ru
Machines should work. People
should think.
IBM Pollyanna Principle
When you try to prove to someone
that a machine won’t work, it will.
Willoughby’s Law

Attempts to create the machine for instant moving through the space (or in the time) have failed, therefore I suggest to not waste time any more on similar silliness. I invite you to invent the machine of luck!

Tell me fairly quickly, what for to create other machines? What for you should move anywhere and to aspire to something greater, if Success already in your pocket? So, the Pocket Machine of Luck! It seems it is that ideal product in which manufacture it is necessary to engage immediately.

But what market? Can you imagine how many people want to buy it? If you think someone will refuse, you are mistaken. I shall not torment you any longer by abstract reasoning. I suggest using the method on contrary immediately!

If there is no clear conception about exterior and structure of machine of luck, it is necessary to find the image of its antipode: the machine of failure. And then search for a way to get it to operate in reverse (if you think the reverse of failure is success!) Or (as a last resort) to find an effective way of canceling the effect of failure, or denying the failure the opportunity to happen.

From abstract formulation of problem we immediately pass to synthesis procedure. For the beginning we shall try to imagine an ideal of failure or (at the worst case) its symbol. For example, a black cat, numbers 13 or 666. Here it is possible to add ten more names of the well-known losers, politicians, tyrants, and the name of geographical points or names to which well-known troubles are connected. For example: The Bermuda Triangle is perfectly included in a circle of troubles and can become a nucleus of a collection of the Misfortune Museum. All these objects are excellent “material” for designing of failure machine. If to mean only numbers the stop watch counting up to 13 and then issuing despicable cry is the modest prototype. The new portion of time (13 seconds) and vicinities covers new groan of the loser!

The following natural step is a resolute break from failure to Success. What exactly it is necessary and expedient to do?

To destroy failure and its symbols!
Now obvious: the machine of failure should be completed with a big hammer for its destruction! It is not a whim, but the fair requirement of a principle of completeness. The machine of failure + means for its destructions simply and naturally forms a “harmonious” pair with adequate and intriguing name “The Machine of luck”! Ignore the generally playful tone of this discussion—actually, the idea is quite serious. Talk about a new product! It seems rather silly to buy such a machine yourself, but you might buy this as a tribute or commemoration of a birth date for a friend. The cost of such a gift will be not more than cost of a nice bouquet of flowers!

Let’s recollect Rubik’s Cube. For many people the cube became a source of irritation, and then turned to a symbol of failures, so the wooden hammer as additional equipment to crush a hated cube would be a good idea. The cube and a hammer were on sale separately. I see the essential omission of the talented inventor in it. He could sell the cube in the set with a hammer from the very beginning in fact, assuming and taking additional profit. We shall act wisely if will sell the completed system! You should agree: It is difficult to struggle against temptation to possess the machine of luck in kind completed and quite ready to use!

Don’t be confused with the strange combination of the squealing stopwatch and a hammer. In fact we do not always aspire to sovereignty of reason. Sometimes we all need immediate and effective satisfaction of a sincere impulse. Therefore the machine of luck has chance to become a funny souvenir or the means of emotional discharge.
What can you invent for April Fools’ Day or the International Day of Laughter?